infinite

fitale-deactivated20150817

If I had to give you one piece of advice it would be this: Don’t be intimidated by other peoples’ opinions.

Paulo Coelho (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

seriously. they’re not valid probably just loud

(via unicornfuckingdracula-intheass)

Source: onlinecounsellingcollege

celestinevibes

Person: Hi I'm Christian.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm Jewish.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm Muslim.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm Wiccan.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm atheist.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm Buddhist.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I'm Hindu.
Me: Cool.
Person: Hi I believe in this and you're wrong so I'm going to tell you all about how wrong you are.
Me: Get the fuck out of my face before I hit you in the face with a frozen turkey.

Source: gingersavecfromage

donotblowmyhigh

If My Dog Could Talk

Dog: WAT DOING
Me: Nothing. I just stood up.
Dog: WHERE GO
Me: I'm literally walking 3 feet away. I'm not even leaving the room.
Dog: CAN I COME
Me: I mean sure but I'm literally just-
Dog: I COME TOO
Dog: WAT DOING
Me: I need to open this door.
Dog: I HALP
Me: No but you're in front of the door. Move please.
Dog: I HALP
Me: Sigh.
Dog: WHERE GOING
Me: I am going right back to the exact place I was sitting a second ago.
Dog: CAN I COME
Me: Sure.
Dog: I SIT IN LAP
Me: No please don't you are-
Dog: I SIT IN LAP
Me: No there's no room and-
Dog: LAP
Me: No, sit on the floor and I'll pet you.
Dog: RIGHT HERE
Me: That's literally on top of my leg.
Dog: IT'S PERFECT PET ME
Me: I am petting you. One second, let me just grab my glass-
Dog: PET ME PET ME PET ME PET ME
Me: I literally am petting you, I just needed a drink-
Dog: PET ME PET ME PET ME PET ME
Me: I AM
Dog: I SIT IN LAP
Dog: PET ME PET ME PET ME
Dog: HOLD SLOBBER TOY
Dog: SNEEZE IN UR FACE
Me: .......

Source: schoolofstitchcraft

visuallyy

She climbs me like the tree
Straddling my legs
And holding on to my neck;
More like my soul,
She engulfs me.
Looking into my eyes,
My soul;
Challenging me to Love her.
To Enter her
Secret place, and Reside there.
To Rock her Gently into the Lively
Lullaby of Love,
To be one with her.
She climbs me
Overcoming my greatness,
Maneuvering around,
My jagged edges
Jutting out sporadically;
In her face,
In the face of her love,
With her eyes seeing me naked.
She conquers me,
And I submit,
And I Love her.

schwernerchaneygoodman:

Climbing

(via schwernerchaneygoodman)

Source: schwernerchaneygoodman

patcheyeghoul-deactivated201610

patcheyeghoul

“All my friends always lie to me
I know they’re thinking
You’re too mean, I don’t like you, fuck you anyway
You make me wanna scream at the top of my lungs
It hurts but I won’t fight you
You suck anyway
You make me wanna die…”

stormkunis-deactivated20170318

flums flums

If u think someone (me) is cute you should tell them (me)

fuckecheeses

Me as a Parent

Child: Hey dad could you please sing a lullaby?
Me: *clears throat* cOMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I BEEN DOIN JUST FINE GOTTA GOTTA BE DOWN BECAUSE I WANT IT ALL

fitale:

corleones:
Me - The 1975
:(

Source: corleones

secretlifeofanescort

secretlifeofanescort secretlifeofanescort

Me: I’m vegetarian because meat is so processed now and I don’t want that shit in my body.
Also me: *snorts cocaine*

violetthourr

I like art, and by art I mean music, poetry, sex, paintings, the human body, literature. All of this is art to me.

Hunter Reve (via bl-ossomed)

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

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If My Dog Could Talk

Me as a Parent